Can we please elect an *actual* child for President?

 In Motherhood, Politics

This morning I realized that talking to young children about important issues is exactly what moderators of the presidential debates must feel like:

Me (starting a conversation about things we can do as a family to help the Earth, which is Gus’s homework this week): So what are some things we can do to help the Earth?

Piper: We could pick up trash.

Me: That’s a good idea.

Gus: Especially in New York. New York smells and there is a lot of trash. (editor’s note: ?????)

Me: Ok, um, what else?

Piper: Chocolate comes from cheese, Mommy.

Me: Sure. What else do you think we can do to help the Earth, though?

Gus: We could put the caps back on our markers.

Me: Great idea. That’s a good one, so we don’t have to….

Gus: Oh! And we could help zebras give birth! You know, so they’re not so…full. And probably we could help them pee for the same reason.

Me: Right. Ok.

Piper: We could use things again.

Me: Great idea. Like what?

Gus: Like the honey jar shaped like a bear. I can’t wait to make something from that when we’re done with the honey.

Me: That…

Piper: NO! I GET THE HONEY JAR WHEN YOU’RE DONE!

Me: Well…

Gus: IT’S MINE! I GET THE HONEY JAR…

Piper: IT IS NOT!!!!!!! IT’S MINE!!!!!

[etc. etc. blah blah blah meltdown blah hitting screaming meltdown blah blah]

End scene. Repeat tomorrow and the next day.

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